Tuesday, 8 April 2014
Hardest Decision
I'm trying to think but my brain isn't functioning well these days. It would be good if I could cry but the tears just wont come out. I always thought that the last resort for any patient who is on life support machine would be by shutting it off. It never occured to me that my dad would be facing a similiar fate. My dad is sickly from his stroke and he is slowly following the dialysis routine but with no progress. Its probably harsh of me to say this but my dad since his stroke, he is mentally disabled. He couldn't think like a normal person would. He is like a child who doesn't want to follow rules. He doesn't want to proceed with his dialysis anymore. That is the ultimate ticking time bomb. As of tomorrow how will this event turn out to be? How do you reason with this kind of person who doesn't want to live anymore? He couldn't stand the pain. He wants to go peacefully. He wants to end his life. The doctors told us of this last resort. Will I have to sign the papers? A consent to let my dad be discharged from the hospital ? Will the world judge me and my family for letting it happen? Even if proceed with a another surgery he is adamant that he wants none of it. He nearly wants to raise his hand towards a nurse for keep on trying to put the needle through despite numerous times it is always end up failure. He is hurt and in high temper and couldn't listen to suggestions. He could hurt a person and this was the last resort the doctors told us. To stop the dialysis...
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